How would you define "wasting time"?

I didn't feel like doing anything today. I didn't want to read any books or do any work. 

I just wanted to laze.

I know, I know...sloth is one of the seven deadly sins.

But I felt so tired after a long week that I don't feel like doing anything serious today. 

So I didn't.

And by the end of the day, as expected, I felt so guilty.

And as it is with my modus operandi, solving  problems through intellectual thinking and research, I went looking for books. 

Talk about irony.

These are what I found:

In Praise of Wasting Time

by Alan Lightman

This book is written by Alan Lightman, an M.I.T professor who says that half our waking minds must be designated and saved for quiet reflection. 

But what is more important I think is what "wasting time" mean in the first place. 

To Lightman, it refers to non-goal oriented uses of time but this book reviewer said that the chapter extolling the virtue of all forms of play is chock-full of goal-oriented activities.

So in the end our mindset is still set on achieving things. 

Can't we just watch a music video on YouTube and not gain anything from it other than to be entertained? 

Can't we watch reruns of Gossip Girl in Netflix just for the drama of it?

Wasting Time on the Internet

by Kenneth Goldsmith

The title and cover of this book look so simple it may beguile you to think it's an unworthy publication that does not deserve your attention. 

But instead it's the work of Kenneth Goldsmith, a poet and conceptual artist who teaches a creative writing course in University of Pennsylvania called "Wasting Time on the Internet", which the 256-page book is obviously named after.

He said that while theorists may claim that the Internet is making us dumber, when his students wasted time together, something magical happened: they became more creative with each other. 

In our digital world, we are reading and socializing differently. We do it in the Internet. We build communities we may never see or even realize we are a part of. We talk to strangers in YouTube, in Instagram, in Twitter. We connect, we create.

So can we say that we are not wasting time but expanding our mind in platforms and areas we will never have had access to if not for the Internet?

So can I go back to watching my cat videos now?

pearlie

A need for time out

I live in a household of introverts and we understand our interaction needs and limitations. And we are comfortable with each other. 

But out of that context, I find it very hard to exist in a world where others expect me to interact all the time. 

I do sometimes turn down invitations and I have walked out of events and gatherings midway before, and I do feel bad about it.

Don't misunderstand me. I do enjoy get-togethers and I do look forward to meeting up with friends and family. 

But there are times when I really need that space for myself. And it's owning that space without feeling guilty about it that is bothering me. 

Maybe what I need to do is to connect with my extroverted friends and ask them how they feel and how they manage it when their invitations or expectations to connect are rejected.

And what introverts need to do is to speak up and extroverts to listen in.

pearlie

Do you like time travel shows?

Do you like to watch time travel shows?

I do, even though it's sometimes impossible to make sense out of them. 

I just finished watching this one:

Tunnel (2017)

And even though its premise and plotline is good, the acting stellar, and the ending satisfying, the series is not able to tie ends properly.

The show is about a police detective who was in the midst of a serial murder case in 1986 who found himself inadvertently time travelled 30 years into year 2016.

And in this new timeline, he had to meet people who were affected by the murders of the case he could not solve in 1986, which of course he finally did in 2016.

It's just that when he goes back to 1986, doesn't whatever that he does then unravels everything he had accomplished in the future?

To me, the only one time travel show that actually make sense is the episode Don't Blink in Doctor Who. 

Watch this short clip and you'd know what I mean.

Don't Blink (2007)


And it's absolutely brilliant.

pearlie

My very 紧张 morning

This morning was indeed very 紧张 (Cant. gan2zoeng1/Mand. jǐn zhāng) for me. 

I almost never mix languages in a single sentence in my blog, though that is very much how most of us converse here in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, where we will sometimes even use up to 4 languages in one sentence—English, Malay, Mandarin and Cantonese or Hokkien. 

I don’t think there is a direct translation for 紧张, but I think “being nervous, stressful, intense and nerve-wrecking” would be quite accurate to translate it. 

And there is no better way to describe what happened to me this morning. 

Today was my US Visa interview day and I requested for the 8:00am slot. I am not allowed to be there earlier than 7:45am and so I decided to drive and park my car at my office and take a GrabCar to the embassy, which is quite nearby. 

My alarm rang at 6:00am but I dillyed-dallyed while keeping an eye on the expected time of arrival on Waze. I planned to arrive at 7:30am and loiter around until 7:45am. 

All was good. 

Until I hopped into my car, and Waze added an extra 30 minutes to the expected time of arrival. 

I started to panic. Oh no, oh no, oh no. 

I tried my best to drive as fast as I could, using the fastest congested lane. 

But traffic was bad. 

And as I considered the two alternatives—drive directly to the embassy and look for a parking space or park in office and take a GrabCar—I decided on the latter. 

I tapped to book a GrabCar at 7:35am while I was still in the Smart Tunnel, which was a good decision because after parking my car and going up to the designated pickup point at the main entrance, the GrabCar arrived just in time at 7:50am. 

The driver used the fastest route possible, using back lanes and shortcuts. And at the slip road into Jalan Tun Razak, I actually begged the policeman to not stop us but let us through. 

I had my hands clasped together like in a prayer rubbing my palms while saying, “Tolong, tolong, tolong, tolong...” (Malay word for “help” but I said it with a Chinese accent).

He must have seen me though he can’t possibly hear me, because he stopped the car behind us instead!

I arrived at the embassy at 8:06am. I was late but thankfully I was still allowed in. 

It was quite a long queue, since I think today is the first interview day for the year after the long Christmas break, but I got it all done in 35 minutes. 

They only asked me four questions and they approved my visa. All the documents I prepared were not requested for. 

They only took my passport. 

Woohoo...USA, here I come. 

pearlie

Do you know how you use your time everyday?

In my current interest in the topic of health and lifestyle, I found a very interesting app called Life Cycle. 

I have uploaded it before but to begin using it, it needs to run for 48 hours. 

I remember when I first did that some time ago, nothing happened after waiting for 48 hours. And so I deleted it in disappointment not realising I should have just wait it out a bit more. 

I tried it again. This time I let it run for 48 hours and then I left it be and soon it started kicking in and now that I see what it does, I really like it. 

The app tracks my time automatically and at the end of everyday, I will be able to see how I have spent my entire day. 

For a person who loves big picture and who almost always think about the purpose of life, this helps fills my curiosity and brings me some sort of a simple understanding and order to my life. 

pearlie

The Golden Pockets of Time

I was scheduled to attend a meeting with the bosses today at 4:30pm. I got prepared, walked over to the venue and waited to be called in. 

And I waited for one whole hour before I went in. 

And what did I do during the hour? Fret? Complain? Got annoyed?

Nope. I did none of those. 

As much as I did not pick up some work to do, since I am not sure when I will be called in and I didn't really want to get into the zone and get lost and lose focus on the stuff  I'm suppose to present to the bosses, I opened my Kindle and started reading. 

And it was a good solid one hour of reading about Praying Backwards by Bryan Chapell. 

These times are hard to come by, but it's the golden pockets of time that I get to do some stuff of value. 

We always tell ourselves we don't have time. 

Why don't you read?

No time. 

Why don't you exercise?

No time. 

Why don't you learn something?

No time. 

But deep down we know that time is not the main reason why we don't those things we know that are good for us, things that take a lot of effort and time. 

It all boils down to our intention, our purpose and what we want out of our lives. 

And we need make time for it. 

pearlie

Am I wasting time learning a new language?

I spent the whole afternoon revising my language flashcards and I suddenly found myself asking this pertinent question: am I wasting time learning a language I will never master or use?

I know I have been very fervent about languages lately and I have been learning Mandarin for the last eight months and Korean for the last eleven. I would spend at least 30 minutes a day initially but as I move on to more complicated parts of the languages, I am now taking at least an hour or two every day to complete the flashcards. 

That is a lot of time on a daily basis, and so I do wonder now if I am wasting my time.

I am quite happy that I am progressing well with my Mandarin, compared to the times when I struggle so hard to learn it but never got beyond just knowing a few common characters. But I still could not think or speak freely in Mandarin, and I still find reading anything in that language difficult. For example, when I had dinner with my mother-in-law yesterday evening, I was helping her with her iPhone settings. But I could not make out what was what when Chinese was the default language. 

More so with Korean. I can now say and write really simple sentences but what on earth am I going to use it for?

The one reason I will not be stopping though is because I already invested so much time in them. 

And my current take on it is this: Chinese is suppose to be my so-called mother-tongue and with it being so widely spoken here, I shall persevere on with it. 

As for Korean, I shall take it as a hobby and what more, I am making really good friends with several Korean language partners and so I’m sticking on with it, for now. 

And I’ll never know, something good may come out of in the future. 

pearlie

How I made friends across the globe over the years

I had several pen-pals back in my childhood days. Those were the times of aerogrammes and postmen. 

I remember back then when I got back from school every day, I'd wait by the doorway anticipating the ring of the postmen bicycle bell, which of course didn't happen very often. 

I'd probably get a reply once every month or two. But thinking back, it does feel like I had a lot of time. 

Life wasn't in a hurry. 

When I started working, I still made pen-pals but this time, it was the email. I had some disposable income then and we even exchanged gifts by mail. 

I remember once coming home to a box on the floor just outside the door. The errant postmen just threw it in and the chocolate in it were mostly reduced to a melted mess. But they still tasted so good. 

Next came the blog. 

I made many more friends through blogging. The exchange wasn't as long as letters or emails but they were current and relevant. But blogging soon took a dive and weren't as active anymore. 

Life has gone into a much faster pace and ironically, there is now not as much time as we had before. There is just not enough of it. 

Now? It's messaging. 

I made several good friends recently via italki in my pursuit of learning new languages. And the messaging apps that I use almost every day are WeChat with my Chinese and Taiwanese friends, and Kakao with my Korean friends. 

It is real-time and it is really like they are there with me, sometimes yakking away way into the night. 

What's next? Holograms?

pearlie

Best time traveling episode ever

I love watching movies and TV dramas about time traveling but I think of all time traveling shows, this one from Doctor Who is by far the best and the scariest of them all, Don't Blink!

pearlie

My biological clock failed me

I am bad at time management but I always make sure I am punctual. However, I turned up late for something this morning. I have always been waking up very early lately and I thought I could trust my so-called biological clock but it failed me today. I had a 9 o'clock thing to attend to but I woke up at 8:55! Thankfully, it wasn't that far away from home and I wasn't that late as a result. But still I was late nonetheless, no excuse. I need to be more careful.

If I have made an appointment with you, I owe you punctuality, I have no right to throw away your time, if I do my own. 

~ Richard Cecil

Punctuality is the politeness of kings. 

~ Louis XVIII of France

Punctuality is the soul of business. 

~ Thomas Chandler Haliburton

Punctuality is the virtue of the bored. 

~ Evelyn Waugh

pearlie

Time is sprinting faster away from us the older we get

We had dinner with my mother-in-law yesterday and she said something quite interesting: she felt that the years go by so fast once you've hit age 50. 

Well, time is subjective and it does travel faster the older you are, and so by the time we are in our 50s, I can imagine time sprinting away before we can catch up with it. 

2016 sure passed by very fast for me and it's a new year now and this too will be gone in no time. 

This reminds me of one of my favourite books which I should read again, Time Warped, Unlocking the Mysteries of Time Perception by Claudia Hammond. 

As summarized by brainpickings.org, "As we grow older, we tend to feel like the previous decade elapsed more rapidly, while the earlier decades of our lives seem to have lasted longer."

When time actually feels faster as we grow older, it is then more important for us to spend it wisely and treasure the moments we have with our loved one. 

pearlie

I am a confirmed procrastinator

Yes, my name is Pearlie and I am a procrastinator. 

If I am not given a deadline, it will take me almost forever to complete something and even if there was a deadline, I will do it at the very last minute.

I have this assessment to take and I have been procrastinating it for two whole months. There is no deadline and I am wishing there is one so that at least I will have to force myself to complete it. 

I found this TED Talk absolutely truthful about who and what I am. 

Inside the Mind of a Master Procrastinator by Tim Urban

I better get the assessment done by the end of this week, on Friday. I need to pretend it is the dead deadline. 

pearlie